Thursday, June 23, 2011

How it All Began

Being a stay at home mom is not for everyone and being forced into it is no fun. Ever since I can remember, I always pictured going out into the world, working hard and not having to rely on anyone for financial support. That meant finding a husband who wasn't looking for a housewife. That is a topic for another blog...

Anyway, the second time around I actually found a husband who had no problem with coming home to having to fix his own dinner as well as that of the children. We took turns coming home late, working extra hours and even working on weekends. I had the life I wanted.

I had three beautiful children, a wonderful husband and a career. Then life happened. I had back surgery and never fully recuperated. That meant bye career, hello kids and house. I was actually in a state of shock for the first month. Hundreds of questions raced through my mind. How would I pay for my things? How would I help my husband with the bills? How would I be able to stay home with three children everyday from now on?

I went through all the staged of grief. I was grieving for my job, career, and time outside of the home. OK. So at this point I must sound like a terrible mom and it's not that I don't love my children, but it wasn't what I had pictured for my life. So after I cried and finished grieving for my former life, I gathered myself and thought about how happy the kids would be to know I would be home.

My daughter, who is the oldest, was the happiest of all. My being home meant no more after school care for her. My sons were happy to have mom all the time. I convinced myself I could do this and got ready for a wonderful new adventure. That is exactly what it has exciting adventure. Everyday I learn something new and ever day I have a whole new set of questions about how we are going to survive. After a little over a year, I am happy to report that I am surviving and even loving being a stay at home mom.